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I'm JM Fisher, Writer & Host Of The Weekly Cynic Podcast.

I'm Currently Available For All Projects Relating To Blogging, Articles & Editing.

Letter To A Young Socialist

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The Young are infatuated and indoctrinated by Socialism, our opinionators of the political duopolies howl.

Look at all the Bernie Bots raging on The Twatter! Spew blue-checked marked Establishment Conservatards. Ocasio-Cortez rolls her R’s for authenticity! In this century alone, 100 million have died from socialism! Look at Venezuela!

TrumpTrumpTrumpRusssiaRussiaRussiaHillaryHillary! Is the Establishment Libtard Refrain.

Sigh.

Our opinionators are Establishment Shills.

They ridicule and demean The Young Socialists because they're well-paid to fortify The Establishment, rather then critically examine it’s flaws.

You, Young Socialist, have realized something is wrong with the established order.

But, Socialism is not the elixir.

Socialism, like Capitalism, like Democracy, is just another archaic Philosophy. Another prearranged, predetermined, curated concept by our Rulers to entrap us. 

I’m not here to persuade you into some alternative philosophy of Libertarianism or Anarchism, only to explain my journey as a Young Idealist.

Okay, that’s only kinda true.

Establishment Socialists are deluded.

Lemme explain…

***

As a high school senior, my final English class project—this was before the years of government mandated “graduation projects” utilized to assess student’s cumulative ability of memorization and regurgitation—was delving into Marx, Engels, The Communist Manifesto and Das Kapital.

Yes, unlike today’s Indolent Intellectuals of Twittersphere collectivism, I actually read The Manifesto. Now, how many volumes  of Das Kapital’s ludicrously ponderous prose did I slog through? Well, I’m pretty sure that big ol’ tome of navy blue leather binding with gold inscriptions was printed Vol I. & II.

And, if anyone tells you they read all of them, just smile and nod.

Unless, you wish to provoke:

“Sure, and I bet you read Paul Krugman, too…” 

“Brah, I read Piketty!”

Anyway, now, 22 years later—ed. note, the writer is lapsing into early senilitycould I launch into a haughty disquisition of those works?

Nah.

But, after high school graduation, and a year long sabbatical from The Education System—high schoolers, if you can, please take a goddamn year off before plunging into your freshman year of college—I ventured into the world of Community College. Why is that significant? Because, Community College is transient, and everyone there wasn’t just working on transferring, they were working. 

Yes, at one time, before the six-figure MBA’er Education System consultants and the Intellectual Class disparaged the idea of college scholars defiling themselves with the idea of work (also, not working is a way to enslave you to The Bankers and their student loans) I submitted myself to a part-time job in Capitalist Corporate Retail.

And you know what that part-time job taught me?

Marx was right: humanity will become disconnected from all that capitalist production.

***

But, my early retail drudgery also enlightened me to another aspect of our rapacious Capitalist System: Money.

For all my sweating within in those summer broiled delivery trucks and hefting Sony Trinitrons up ladders, I never felt embittered by my minimum wage rate of $5.15. My coworkers, a life scarred crew of delinquents, alcoholics and middle-aged retail veterans, never grumbled or plotted some proletarian rebellion.

Instead, I was intrigued by the construct of Money, of how those Green Inked Sheets dispensed from the bank teller’s hands (Yes, back ‘em dem der days, before the proliferation of direct deposit, I cashed my paycheck) were borne into existence… And of what Authority issued those diabolical Green Inked Sheets of human entrapment and how the hell they could seemingly, arbitrarily assign value.

Eventually, Young Socialist, I did illuminate myself to the origins of Money and to the practitioners of fractional reserve banking. But, to keep this blog piece within its scope, and to instill a bit of self-reliance and inquisitiveness, I will refrain from the history of Banking.

***

When I transferred from The Community College to The Small, Private Liberal Arts College, I was recruited to join another Capitalist Retail Corporation. At the new conglomerate, I received a boost from the menial wage to $8.25. 

I was…ecstatic. 

Yes, I was still demeaned by the public and bullied by dimwitted, incompetent management who demanded absurdist levels of productivity, but, Dude… 8. 25.

Also, at the new conglomerate, I was eligible for direct deposit! And, what a devious banking innovation it was! Sweated and hunched from all my laboring, I would no longer have to galumph to The Bank for my Green Inked Sheets! Never would I have to worry about physical money again! It could be securely and conveniently virtualized into my bank account! (Don’t underestimate the psychological engineering of that feat!)

Over the next 12 years, I devoted the most Instagrammable period of my life to this new Capitalist Retail Corporation: enduring the churning personalities of store and regional management, defying burdensome, bureaucratic company policies, graduating from The Small, Private Liberal Arts College with my coveted literature degree while somehow scaling various rungs of The Corporate Ladder.

During that time, as I progressed from the menial wage to salary servitude, the  Capitalist Retail Corporation also transformed: it’s founding ethos of hard work that produced value for both customer, employee and company was vanquished for a Harvard MBA cabal of Leadership whose core values was asset stripping all levels of the company to ensure profitability. 

The era I had experienced as a college brat, where even minor merit raises signified appreciation, and department bonuses—for not only the leads but the entire department—inspired a unified focus and camaraderie, was now supplanted with algorithmic matrices that dictated, or let’s be honest, froze or capped your Monies. Whenever one of us plebeian’s of the store level would dispute the authority of Corporate’s AI God, our District or Regional Leadership would lecture us in the nuances of The Business World: America was in upheaval, writhing from the cumulative effects of not only The Dot-Com Bubble burst, but 9/11 and it’s economic aftermath, and The 2008 Financial Crisis (Central Banker instigated, I would interject to the disapproving or quizzical stare of our esteemed District or Regional Manager—er, Leader) which would require ever more dedication to tightening the belts. 

Now, within these conditions, we were trapped.

How could one rebel against The Capitalist Retail Corporation without losing your meager scrap of The American Dream?

Everywhere there was desperate, bedraggled workers foraging for jobs, groveling for any amount of Money because all of them were burdened with mortgages, car loans, credit card and student loan debt, child care and all the other trappings of The American Dream. Everyone, no matter their qualifications, experience and loyalty was deemed interchangeable. Everyone was essentially a commodity. A disposable cog in The Great Capitalist Machine.

Again, Marx was right.

***

If only we had strong unions, Jake! If there had been a formidable and valiant Retail Managers Union to protect and promote your interests against the vile Capitalist Retail Corporation!

Ah, yes, another immortal refrain of The Establishment Socialist. 

But, why seek refuge within a Union, an entity predicated on Money? 

Jake! A Union is composed of altruists! Loyal servants fighting the good fight! I mean, once those evil Capitalists froze your Money, the Union could have fought for a living wage! $15 an hour!

Establishment Socialist, Humanity is on the precipice of The Fourth Industrial Revolution. Technology is accelerating, Artificial Intelligence will dominate, and Automation will eradicate the Working and Middle Class of manufacturing, warehousing, logistics and menial retail work…

Jake! That’s why we will have a Universal Basic Income for all!

Who will issue this UBI, this money?

The Government, Jake!

And where does the Government get the money?

Uh… Uh… (trickling into silence)

Here, Young Socialist is the incurable defect in your Establishment Brethren: Institutions As Savior. Institutions that are underpinned by Hierarchical Systems Of Power. Institutions Of Hierarchical Systems Of Power Governed by Money. It is this symbiosis that controls Humanity, its actions and thoughts. 

These Institutions Of Hierarchical Systems Of Power, whether it be the Capitalist Retail Corporation, a Union or Government, espouse all sorts of dogma—i.e. Leadership, Democracy—to indoctrinate and corrupt. They inoculate against subjectivity, objectivity, rationality, logic, hell, any type of free-thinking. They demand compliance and conformity at all levels of the ladder. If you don’t espouse The Holy, thou shall be expelled to—as David Graeber described them—some bullshit job of middle management, forever mollified by salary and its attached benefits. Or, vanquished to the dole line.

Establishment Socialists rail against the Capitalists, but rarely indict the Institutions and patterns of human behavior that allow them to flourish. During The Election Of 2016, Bernie Sanders castigated The Capitalists for rampant income inequality, but never preached about Ending The Fed. 

A few weeks ago, Trevor Noah interviewed The Establishment Socialists latest creation, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, and he posed the classic question, How Will You Pay For This? 

Her reply was that of the Indolent Intellectual: circuitous, blubbering obfuscation.

When Bernie Sanders was asked the same question during The Election Of 2016, his response was Print More Money!

Banksters and economists of both Keynesianism and Austrian disciplines chortled, My Gawd, Bernie, where have you been! The last ten years has seen the Earth’s Central Banks in a coordinated operation of Quantitive Easing! 

That, Young Socialist, is the cause of your rampant income inequality.

***

Jake! You still don’t understand! If only WE, virtuous Socialists, could claim positions of Power, positions in all the major Institutions, like Government, Media, Education and Banking, we could REFORM them!

Reform is a soothing, romantic tactic to The Establishment Socialist. It allows them the continued opportunity to peddle the social part of Socialism, that humans, organized by some like-minded philosophy, will attain enlightenment and revolutionize The World. The Establishment Socialist fails to understand that Humans, as a species, are frail and vulnerable creatures, their primitive, survivalist mindset easily exploited, which The Institutions of Hierarchical Systems Of Power understand, making it easy for them to maintain power…generational power.

They also fail to realize humans are incredibly lazy.

If we just get power, we can make real change in this world!

Yes, somehow, The Chosen Few will navigate these corrupt, indoctrinating Institutions Of Hierarchical Systems Of Power, their ideals remaining sufficiently or fully intact to enact The Grand Revolution!

The Chosen Few will infiltrate! It’s incremental, Jake! That’s how it will be done! 

Uh-huh.

Reform is actually modifying, retrofitting, splicing, dicing, duct-taping mechanisms onto an already faltering System, impairing its functioning and magnifying the destruction upon it’s death.

***

I admit, there is some validity to Marx. His influence still tinges my perceptions of The World, but, why do we still cling to The Philosophies Of Old Dead White Guys? Why do we trust those Academics, Politicians and Opinionators who extoll these philosophies as some singular path to enlightenment and planetary happiness? Are they not just Hucksters and Shills for these Institutions Of Hierarchical Systems Of Power?

Is it because we’re too lazy to create new philosophies? Too beaten down by the Capitalist System, so we rely on recycled, reformulated, revisionist philosophies?

There are those who advocate for community based parallel systems and infrastructure that can be initiated after the Collapse.

But, wasn’t that Bitcoin? Much lauded by Anarchists, Anarcho-Capitalists and Austrian economists as the antidote to our Federal Reserve System of Money? This digital, virtual currency that would allow Humanity to flourish?

Aaaaaannnndddddd….how’s that working out?

The Hucksters, Racketeers and Speculators have exploited and violated, inflating its value beyond the means of the average investor. 

Or, just the average person trying to survive.

Yes, good ol’ Capitalism…

Wait—

Or, is it just Human nature?

Maybe, that’s where we start. Stripping ourselves of all the ideas and philosophies of our Systems, until we’re just a blank slate to inscribe our—

Hey, Jake, I hear you’re in the market for some blank slates! I just got a shipment! Italian! Marble! I give you a good deal!


The Man Of Your Dreams

HUMANS, NATURE & OLD HOUSES