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I'm JM Fisher, Writer & Host Of The Weekly Cynic Podcast.

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A Banana Universe

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My friend responds with a sighing, confessional chuckle.

“Yeah, how the hell do I approach this without sounding nutty? I mean… Should we silence Alexa? Shutoff our phones? I don’t want this story to impact my social credit-mental health score.”

“Maybe…” I smile. “You’re probably in a few databases, anyway.”

My friend nods. “Yeah, I go into work tomorrow and have an urgent email from human resources demanding I have a quote, metal health check, before starting my day of drudgery.” He smirks, “It doesn’t matter…”

According to my friend, he experienced a moment of dimensional clarity.

“I was peeling a banana and…the whole process of it, tearing off its shell, stripping those veiny, annoying threads away, became hyper intense—surreal, I should say. I had this glimpse of recognition, of experiencing myself doing this very simple task, in another life…a previous life. A very primitive life. I mean, I was staring at hands that were gruff and hairy. And, out of my peripheral vision, there was sand and an ocean. Also, above me, I could feel the presence, the proximity of a tree bough. Then, it vanished. All of it happened within…seconds.

“Huh.”

“Yeah…This wasn’t the first time I had experienced an old Far Side cartoon.”

Over the last few weeks, ordinary, everyday activities were becoming spontaneously imbued with this preternatural vividness.

“Some of it is very déjà vu. Other times, I feel like I’m straddling dimensions and all I would have to do is envision letting go…falling away into that world.”

“Sooo….I take it you’re a little stressed out these days?”

My friend laughs.

“What the fuck do you think? My job sucks right now. My wife is miserable since her promotion. I have a ten year old who is running rampant. And…every time I attempt some quiet time, life interrupts or erupts. There is nowhere to escape. That’s why I deleted all my social media accounts. Even my LinkedIn. Oh, get this…I deleted that and I get an email from one of my old colleagues, ‘Hey bro why did you delete your LinkedIn I got..’ No, fuck that. It’s a fucking cult. I even told my wife, I’m getting a goddamn flip phone. Fuck this shit. No wonder all these young kids are paranoid and depressed, the onslaught of…nonsense one gets is unbelievable. Hell, you know the memes where people are just staring into their phones while the world goes to hell around them? The other day, for probably the first time in years, I turned my off my phone while I was on the train. I just sat there. No iPhone. No newspaper. I just stared out the window, looking at scenery I hadn’t seen in forever. Then, I looked around me: every goddamn person on the fucking train was hunched down into their phones. Except some young hottie reading a book.”

I laughed.

“Dude, I’m serious. You know what, I’m not spiritual, religious, anything like that. But, all these incidents I’ve been having make me think that maybe, just maybe the universe with a capital U is trying to tell me something.”

I nod. “Could be. Maybe I should start eating more bananas.”

“You know what? Here’s the thing: My wife has been on an organic food spree. That banana was organic. Maybe I need to start eating GMO bananas again. Kill off all my brain cells. The organic stuff is too healthy. Too good for my soul.”

“Maybe you just need to drink more…”

“Exactly.”


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