Backside To Remain 
Off Screen For Now

Hollywood – Rumors abound last week as to the health of female vocalist Vonda Shepherd. Shepherd, who is seen in virtually every episode of the FOX comedy "Ally McBeal" , though featured regularly, has never been seen to immerge from behind her piano, leading to speculation that she is without the benefit of a lower torso. When questioned as to whether or not this was true, or had she simply been surgically attached to the piano stool, Beatrice Trinity, spokesman for the studio said, "That is just simply absurd!" , "I assure you we would never resort to a ratical procedure involving surgery when epoxy serves the same purpose without the risk of any dangerous complications" When asked if there were any future plans to give the entertainer a speaking part she replied "Not at this time. We feel one stuttering character is sufficient in our current scheme"